Retirement Quotes

. 6 min read . Written by Martin Dejnicki
Retirement Quotes

Hope you enjoy reading and sharing my little collection of retirement quotes. Some of these quotes are meant to be sentimental, while others are thought provoking and some should make you laugh.

Let's begin by looking at a few general retirement quotes:

Just because you retired, doesn't mean you stopped loving what you do.

~ tree.cards

Retirement brings the ball finally onto your court, where you get to make all the rules.

~ tree.cards

How busy you will be during retirement depends on how many projects you began and haven't gotten around to completing prior to retiring.

~ tree.cards

Retirement gives each of us another opportunity to smell the flowers. Once again, some of us will, and some of us won't.

~ tree.cards

If you didn't fancy your job, retirement is definitely a liberating finish line.

~ tree.cards

There are plenty more specific retirement quotes right below. These quotes and sayings may be included inside retirement cards or even on top of a retirement cake.

You could also incorporate them with your retirement speech and/or wishes.

If one of your colleagues is retiring, then you may share these quotes as a way of saying farewell, and thank you for everything that you have done.

Funny Quotes about Retirement

Enjoy the following funny quotes about retirement. Hope you find them humorous and hilarious, and don't forget to share them with family and friends.

Are you telling me that I've worked for 45 years, for a lousy 10% discount? That barely covers the rising inflation from the time I get up until I reach the drug store.

~ tree.cards

Retirement usually means the value of your home has increased proportionately with the size of your ears over the past five decades. My house tripled, yet I can't hear a darn thing.

~ tree.cards

Retirement is sweet. I wish I retired 40 years ago.

~ tree.cards

It takes 10 long years of retirement, before they let you into the Slow Motion Club.

~ tree.cards

Now that I'm retired, do I have to volunteer and be nice?

~ tree.cards

The trick is to make retirement blend into the rest of your life.

~ tree.cards

I received a nice plaque and a bucket full of recognition. But in my heart, I just wanted more dough.

~ tree.cards

Those who retire early talk about packages. While those who retire late talk about making a difference. Anyways, where's my package?

~ tree.cards

Retirement is like skiing. Not only are you going downhill, but there's never enough support falling from the sky.

~ tree.cards

You may also wish to share these at the retirement party.

Inspirational Retirement Quotes

Here's a few inspirational quotes that are meant to inspire that special person in your life who is about to retire.

Retirement gives us all a chance to do good things in our communities.

~ tree.cards

Your #1 responsibility during retirement is to pass down to younger generations your encyclopedic knowledge and life's experiences.

~ tree.cards

As long as you have your precious memories, retirement shall not be a lonely journey.

~ tree.cards

Now that I'm retired, I will do three things: slow down, enjoy nature, and play like a child.

~ tree.cards

Be proud of your work and successes spanning your entire career.

~ tree.cards

It's not about what you did and for how much, but rather the friends that you made along the way.

~ tree.cards

It was all worth it, if your job or career helped you pay the bills. Multiply that by 1 million if you also had fun.

~ tree.cards

Famous Quotes About Retirement

The following famous quotes that talk about retirement are among my favorite. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did.

The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.

~ Abe Lemons

The key to retirement is to find joy in the little things.

~ Susan Miller

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.

~ George Burns

When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income.

~ Chi Chi Rodriguez

Retirement Quotes for Women

Here's a few quotes that were written specifically for all those women who are retiring or have already retired. I plan on sharing them with my mom in a few years, when she reaches her retirement age.

If retirement means I will spend more time with my husband, then I may need to find another job.

~ tree.cards

A woman may retire from her profession, but she will never retire her compassion and motherly instincts.

~ tree.cards

Now that I'm retired, I may pursue my true passions - shoe shopping and gossip.

~ tree.cards

For many women, retirement is not just the end of an illustrious career, but rather a promotion to being a full-time grandmother.

~ tree.cards

When a woman retires, both office drama and office fun decrease exponentially.

~ tree.cards

Retirement is a great excuse to change my wardrobe.

~ tree.cards

Her retirement shall bloom like the most beautiful flower.

~ tree.cards

When a woman retires, her colleagues will miss not just her expertise and wisdom, but also her smile.

~ tree.cards

Quotes for Men Who Are Retiring

I think my favorite among the following is the one that talks about beer.

Most men wish of retiring at the young age of 25. Forty years later they no longer care about retiring, but wish they were 25.

~ tree.cards

A few men love their work so much that they retire the moment they stop breathing. The rest of us read their biographies, and just want to play golf.

~ tree.cards

Retirement is like a cold beer. It's a refreshing necessity for all men.

~ tree.cards

Leading a lazy career is the work experience required for retirement.

~ tree.cards

When my body told me no for the ten thousandth time, I knew it was time to retire.

~ tree.cards

When men retire, they suddenly become radical politicians with more wisdom than Aristotle himself.

~ tree.cards

Retirement Quotes for Teachers

Teachers are wonderful human beings, and the following quotes are dedicated to all the teachers out there who will be leaving their profession. Feel free to share them with your teachers.

For every great teacher that retires, there's always a school full of tears.

~ tree.cards

Teachers are programmed to educate and inspire children. When they retire, they educate and inspire children their own age.

~ tree.cards

My class became dead silent and I achieved this without yelling. I simply announced my retirement.

~ tree.cards

You know that a teacher has retired when her summer vacation lasts 12 months.

~ tree.cards

The difference between good and great teachers is a simple calculation. Just count how many kids beg them not to do it.

~ tree.cards

Quotes about Retirement for Nurses

These quotes were written for every nurse out there that dedicated her or his life to helping the sick. For everything they have done, we are truly grateful.

For everything that they do, nurses deserve to retire 10 years earlier.

~ tree.cards

She helped the sick for so many years, cared and fed them, and wiped their tears.

~ tree.cards

Retired nurses must learn to take and not just give.

~ tree.cards

Nurses are truly special human beings. When one retires, the pain is felt in many hearts.

~ tree.cards

Military Retirement Quotes

The men and women of the military have sacrificed a lot for us all. Well, these military quotes are for them.

When you spend your career risking your life protecting your country, your pension will pay the bills, while each random thank you justifies your sacrifices.

~ tree.cards

You can never completely retire from the military because there are always communities and neighbourhoods to guard and patrol.

~ tree.cards

All those years in the military has taught me the importance of family.

~ tree.cards

If you're ever interested in seeing an exceptionally organized sock drawer, visit a retired military vet.

~ tree.cards

They assumed that I was blind, since I was the only one that did not panic. But they didn't know I spent my life in the military.

~ tree.cards

It's hard to adapt to a mundane life after retiring from the adrenaline factory known as the military.

~ tree.cards

My military story has ended, yet they insist on calling me a hero. But I wasn't trying to be a hero. I was just trying to survive.

~ tree.cards

I don't miss the gunfire or missions, as much as I miss the camaraderie among friends.

~ tree.cards

Quotes About a Happy Retirement

Here's a bunch of random happy retirement quotes. I hope they bring a smile to both you and the retired.

Enjoy the sun, enjoy the martinis, and simply relax.

~ tree.cards

The secret to a happy retirement is a healthy imagination.

~ tree.cards

The prerequisite to a happy retirement is a happy pre-retirement.

~ tree.cards

If you want a happy retirement, then don't spend all your money at the casino. There are places where they show more skin.

~ tree.cards

I retired happy, and in approximately 20 or 30 years I will die happy. Ok, maybe not the second part.

~ tree.cards

The day I retired everything suddenly slowed down. Except happiness!

~ tree.cards

Fun Retirement Quotes

The last category in this section includes a few fun retirement quotes. My favorite one is definitely the very last one. Enjoy!

A retirement is so much more special when you create a habit of bragging about it.

~ tree.cards

Now that I'm retired, I can finally stay up on Sunday nights.

~ tree.cards

All jokes aside, don't take your retirement lightly, since it's too late for dieting.

~ tree.cards

It's not about where you retire, but who you retire with.

~ tree.cards

Thanks for taking the time to read my assortment of retirement quotes. I hope they made you smile, laugh, and even nod your head.

Have fun sharing the ones you like the most with family and friends (and of course the retired).